Weird URLs

Some Sites From the Curio Shop

• Not Fooling Anybody: Home

  A chronicle of bad storefront conversions.

  The penultimate source for what you need to stop worrying about culture going down the toilet and embrace urban sprawl. I was amazed to find several examples from where I live.

• The AOLer Translator

  Translate English into12-year-old AOLerese.

  English is becoming a dead language online. The slovenly usage of u, r, y as words shows the downward spiral into gobbledegoop. Now there is help for those who want to type to the less spelling sensetive younger generation.

• Aliens and UFO's

  Exposing the Unfruitful Works of Darkness! nuff said...

  Pernicious trans-dimensional alien demons are here and they are pissed. They have invaded Earth on a campain of terror and destruction. Beware! These critters are lusting after your eternal soul! ET phone home... TO HELL!

• Bird Diapers Bird Leashes and Harneses!

  New! Duck, Goose and Chicken Diapers Too!

  Now there is help for those long-suffering legions of incontinent avians around the world. Better modern living through technology. And who said the age of miracles has passed us by?

Another Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood

Old Farts at Play on Anything Can Happen Day!

Its Wednesday boys and girls, and we know what that means! it's Anything Can Happen Day! Wednesday nights is the weekly game night for a group of old friends. We have got together nearly every week for the past 25 years to play games. Some of us have know each other since childhood. I have known some of them for 35 years. I have traveled and lived other places but I know that when I return the lost boys is still there.

Loving My Third Childhood

I am proud to say that I am now in my third childhood. In my first time as a child they told me to grow up. In my second childhood they told me to act my age..... But in my third childhood they just throw their arms up in disgust and say I give up.. Passing you the bag of pop rocks and grins...

Sonic Torture Chamber

We were listening to Q-101 at work and the Bad Music Monkey files were of the most amazingly bad performer I had heard since a street ummmmm performer/psychotic named Wild Man Fisher. The featured artist was Shooby Taylor. Shooby was a scat singer who specialised in working his instrument into gospel music. It is a jarring cocktail in the spirit of a lounge lizard rendition of the tune "I Want To be Sedated".

Even though he almost achieved brilliance in his opening of the tune "Why Me Lord?" His cover of the old Judy Garland song "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" would have anyone screaming Surrender dorthy in less time than it took me to type the words. He defines a new previously unknown level of suckage. It's so bad that they need a new word to define it. I'm just glad he never teamed up with Yoko Ono. So without further ado.. I present to you. Shooby Taylor - The Human Horn..

You Want Fries With That?

I have spent much time wondering how humans are going to survive as a species in what has become an ever increasingly complex world. Here is some more evidence that we may not make it.

I was on the road late at night and needed a break to stretch my legs. Stopping at a truck stop I saw that there was an open Burger King. I stood in line waiting for my turn at the register. I placed an order for some Chicken Tenders. The kid behind the counter grunted and mumbled that it would take a while. I counted out the money and paid him with exact change. Silence decended as I watched the counter droid attempt determine I had given him enough money. He finially, muttered, "I guess that's right."

Then he looked at me and asked "Will that be for here?" To which I said to him "No it will not." He looked at me with a slightly puzzled expression and asked "well then sir, is it to go?" I looked him in the eye and with a smile I asked him, "Is there a third alternative Sparky?" to which he sort of went into a momentary trance, looked at me with that bewildered deer in the headlight look so many minimum wagers get and said "huh?" and shambled off to see if my food had cooled off enough for them to give it to me.